Thursday, September 23, 2010
I try to imagine how she feels by imagining how I feel when I am all excited to tell hubby about something, only to get that glazed far away look, an hmm mmm mumble for an answer or a "not now I am busy" answer. That is exactly how she feels when I do not listen.
Now, I try to listen to her better and along with the extra hugs, she is happier and behaving a lot better. Oh, I do not drop everything just to listen to her. I think that would be encouraging her to seek more attention. However, I tell her that sometimes I am busy and cannot give her my full attention. I tell her that she must choose the right time to speak and not barge in whenever she likes. I am teaching her to respect my time and in return, I also allocate time to listen to her fully. When I am available, I tell her "Now, I am free, what was it you wanted to tell me earlier."
Sometimes the kids do not like this. They say, "if you make us wait, we forget what we want to say." I have to tell them that if it is important enough, they won't forget it. They still sulk at this but I have to be firm with them.
It is not easy to listen to kids. They speak everything that comes to mind and that is usually a lot. They would describe a whole lot events in perfect details leading to just one point. Sometimes we tend to tune out after a while. We are still there but no longer there.... and they know it!
You would become a really good listener if you learned to listen to kids especially if you have to do it 24/7!
Listening is an important skill for any relationship. I am going to keep on practising and improving on my listening skills. How about you? Are you listening? Pin It