One to One Time

I think it is important sometimes to spend one to one time with each child we have. Hopefully that will reduce sibling rivalry and make each child feel special and important. Everyone wants a piece of mummy, whether it is a hug or attention. So during one to one time it is important to give all the attention and hugs and child craves for.

This holidays, the girl has an early holiday whereas the boy's holidays will start later since he wants to attend some school holiday program with his kindergarten friends. The boy is not unhappy that his school holidays is starting later. He is delighted to go to school to play with his friends and enjoy the various parties the school has organised.

The girl is happy to have an early start to her school holidays. I am sure she is also looking forward to having some one to one time with mummy. I wonder what we shall do. For starters, today, she wants me to sit and draw and colour a space picture with her. :)

Pin It

What to do?

My girl has been complaining about "dreaming" again and seeing "green green" and headaches. Even the doctor has trouble diagnosing these symptoms. The neurologist can't decide whether they are the auras that come with epilepsy or perhaps they could even be simple partial seizures, or perhaps they are auras associated with migraine or it could even by pyschological. Sigh.

Whatever they are, they are worrying. And the question is What to do? Should the doctor increase her antiseizure medications? I'd hate to see it being increased. I cringe when I think about what all the medication she is taking is doing to her developing kidneys. I am reluctant to increase the dosage. But then is the current dosage doing its job to stop symptoms? Perhaps increasing it would stop all these symptoms. But what if these weren't symptoms but something else. What if we increased it unnecessarily? What then? What if the symptoms do not go away after the increase. What then? Increase some more?

My opinion is to wait until something happens before deciding whether to increase. But of course that is a very hard decision. Waiting for something to happens means waiting for another seizure. But when will it happen? What if it happens in school in front of all her friends. She is already having trouble making friends since she is somewhat shy. The children are still so young. They will not understand her condition and may shy away from being friends with her. I'd hate to see that and what it would do to her already somewhat low self esteem.

What if? What if? What if? I am going mad. And each night whenever she flips this way or that or lets out a loud breath or murmur which she tends to do since she has a perpetual blocked nose and often breathes through the mouth when she sleeps, I literally jump up from my sleep worrying, so afraid I'd see another seizure. I don't know what to do and I don't think the doctor knows either. These things are hard to decide upon even for the doctor because they are unclear, not clean cut crystal clear like if you have a pain you take panadol that kind of thing. What to do?

I am relieved that her exams are over. At least there is no stress for now. One less seizure trigger. So for now, I can concentrate on trying to make sure she gets enough rest and sleep. However, next year she will be in Standard 3 in a Chinese School and we all know that that equates to little sleep and more stress. Sigh. We will cross the bridge when we come to it.

Pin It

All they want is some tender loving care

My girl is always bombarding me with "How" questions.

"Mummy, I really hate to go to school on Mondays. How?"
"Mummy, the mosquito bit me and my hand is really itchy. How?"
"Mummy, my stomach pain. How?"

Sometimes, after several repetitive "Hows" with no satisfactory answers, she adds

"Can sayang me ah?"

Then it finally dawned on me, that all she wants is some pampering and loving. She does not really want me to give her the answer to her "How". (Because most of the time there is no answer but she pesters persistently even when I tell her I don't know the answer.)

However, finally I realised that all she wants is for me to hug her and tell her, "It is okay. Everyone hates school at some time or another." or hug her and apply some medicine for her stomach or hand or ear or eye or whatever it is that is bothering her at the time. All she wants is a little tender loving care. Ting! Lightbulb moment.

What a dunce I am. I finally got it. All this while I have been so irritated by all the endless, pestering "Hows" and at last I finally got it. I told her about it too (this new revelation of mine) and she smiled and asked "Can sayang me ah?"

"Of course! Hugs are free. They are available anytime." Thats what I told her and she grinned happily.

The boy is different. He does not ask. He is a natural hugger. He just simply comes up to you and gives me his little big bear hug whenever he feels like it, which is often, sometimes strangling me in the process :)

Pin It

What my mother taught me

My mother died when I was young. However, one lesson which I clearly remember from her is to give the best to others. My mother said that it is not okay to reach out for that delicious looking chicken drumstick or the best foods on the table. One should always let the others have the better parts.

I do not see this happening these days. Quite often when eating out in a group, I sometimes see the parents reaching out and grabbing the best parts for their kids and place it in a platter in front of them. Sometimes the kids can't even finish the portion but nevermind that, the important thing is to reserve the best parts for the kids.

I wonder what these parents are teaching the kids. ...  that it is ok to be selfish and put oneself above others? I know it is just food but then manners as with everything else begins with little things.

Pin It

You're Growing Up!

I have not written a poem in a long while. So, here is one dedicated for my little sweetheart, my girl who is now 8. Feel free to copy this poem if you like but a link back would be most appreciated. Thank you. Links to more of my poems can be found here.

For my little sweetie pie

You're Growing Up!

You're growing up sweetheart

It seems like just yesterday when I held you in my arms

And looked at your little face

Now I can't even lift you up for a closer embrace

You're so tall now sweetie

Wasn't it only days ago that you sat up and crawled

Now you're running at the malls

Zigzagging here and there not afraid to fall

You love skipping and singing little one

It makes me happy to see you happy like this

You talk a lot now too compared to your first word "daddy"

We cherish you right from the time you were a baby

You like to choose your food now dearie

That is fine because I know you are growing up

It is a lot better than those days

When you pushed out every food we brought your way

You can do so many things on your own now darling

Read and eat and draw and bathe

When once upon a time we felt anxious during separation

While it took almost a year for your toilet education

My sweetie pie, you have still a long road to travel

But I hope that each step you take

Is filled with happiness, joy and laughter,

And all the love that we can give you from now till forever after

 

Pin It