Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Another EEG test

One night last week, my girl gave me another scare. I was woken up by her moans but she didn't respond when I called out to her. I thought I saw her moving/jerking in bed. When I switched on the lights and tried to wake her I saw that her eyes were open but her left eye was twitching. She looked blank and did not respond.

I called the paed neuro the next day and she advised us to bring her in for another EEG test. My heart was so heavy and filled with fear. It still is. I am very sad, scared and worried.

When I told my girl that she would be missing school because she had to go for another EEG her response was "Why do I have to go and see the brain doctor? I don't have a headache." I explained to her that its just a routine check and the doctor will give her a MC for not attending school. She went "Hurray!" and started prancing around. Such innocence. I smiled at her but my heart was very very heavy. I reminded her that they will attach many wires from her head to the computer and she will be asked to blow into a bag (to simulate hyperventilation) and they were going to ask her to look at flashing lights. She asked whether it was going to be the same girl who will ask her to blow into a bag because she liked the girl.

She is only 7. She is a bright and intelligent child, a good girl. My husband and I were worried that if she had to take medication, it would stiffle her individuality.

We had to keep her sleep deprived for the EEG so we let her go to sleep later and woke her up earlier in the morning. During one part of the EEG she had to go to sleep. This time the EEG was more professional than the one we did 2 months ago. During that EEG test there was no one else allowed in the room with her. Fortunately the technician was a lady, otherwise I would have insisted on being there too. This time there were two technicians, a lady and a man and I was allowed to be in the room.

Just when I was wondering how on earth she was going to fall asleep with 2 technicians and her mom staring at her, and just when they had sent hubby to go and buy sedatives and a syringe, she fell asleep. Later on when I asked her how she did it, she said she counted numbers.

The EEG turned out normal. Another EEG done 2 months ago was normal too but the doctor says that normal does not mean that she is not epileptic. She says that she does not want to label her yet but she thinks there is a 60% chance that she is. She says that if there is another episode than she may consider other tests and even if another EEG turns out normal, she may consider medication.

It feels hard to even write this down but writing is a form of therapy for me to get it out of my chest and think things through more subjectively instead of emotionally. However, I must say that writing does not help this time. I still feel disturbed. I do not feel at peace. I am worried about her especially when we go to bed and when she is away from me at school.

I hope that it was just a nightmare that she was experiencing but the doctor does not seem to think so. I guess a normal EEG is the better outcome for now since there is still some hope. However I am worried because in my case after one seizure in my sleep, the doctor said one seizure does not make you an epileptic. After a second seizure in my sleep, the doctor said its ok not to take medication at this point. And then I had 3 seizures in a day while I was awake and had to be hospitalised. I am worried that the same thing will happen to her. So is a normal EEG and non-medication really the better outcome? I don't know. I really don't know.

When it happened to me, I was scared for a while, but I think I can come to terms with it more easily than if it were to happen to any of my kids. That is very very much harder to handle. Afterall, I have done all the things that I wanted to do when I was young without this burden. I am a housewife now so to me its not so crucial but to a young kid who has a whole life to live and look forward to, a kid will face many more pressures, pressures as well as misunderstanding from the people around them.

If there is anyone whose child has to undergo an EEG, please take not that it is a harmless, non invasive test.

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  1. i'm so sorry for u n ur girl. i want to say i know how u feels but i bet u feel even worst than what anybody is feeling as u r her mother. pls stay strong n take care. i hope the best will come to u n ur family. take care.

  2. Hi Merryn,
    Thank you. I do feel so torn. I don't feel peace in my heart, just worries. I need to talk about it, yet I don't feel like talking about it. Thats probably why I "hide" this post on this blog where less ppl read.

  3. hey MG, very sorry to hear this. *sigh* it's not an easy thing to go through. i understand what you are feeling now. pray hard that everything will be fine soon. *hugs*

  4. *hugs* I don't know what else I can say but I hope eeverything will be fine.

  5. We pray for good news. Hang in there.

  6. hi MG, I can imagine your worry and unsettled feeling. Just hang in there and if you need a listening ear, I'll be there.

  7. a&a'smom5:00 PM, July 06, 2009

    Dear MG,
    Will have u in our prayers, Hugs!
    This Aug will be 2 yrs since Abj episode. We r praying that it was his 1st & last 1. Doc has given to reduce his meds to once a day aftter his UPSR exams & if he's ok to stop completely after Dec.

  8. a&a's mom,
    Does the meds affect him in any way? Did you find the right meds straight away? Sorry. You can reply me privately in email if you prefer. Thanks.

  9. a&a'smom10:21 PM, July 10, 2009

    MG, so far we dont see any side effects. He's doing very well in school & seems happy & confident. He also luvs playing football. Hoping & praying once the meds it's stopped completely, he wont have any fits. The doc put him on Epilim immediately (2 tabs daily). I make sure he has enough rest & play time eversince his episode.

    2 weeks ago my cousin's 5 yro old daughter had her 1st fit while she was sleeping. She opened her eyes & suddenly threw up. Then he body shook & she started foaming in the mouth. Her EEG showed she had a fit. They r in India. Praying that it wll never reoccur for her too.


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