Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Facing a mother's greatest fear

I have written before about my greatest fear as a mother and recently I had to face my fear again. Like before, whats scary about it was it was an ordinary day, just like any other. I had bathed both the kids and left them both to play on the carpet while I got ready to bathe myself. I bent down to put the radio on to listen to and the next thing I knew I woke up on the floor after a seizure with my husband and children starring at me.

I remember waking up twice more, once on the sofa and another time on the bed but thats not exactly what happened according to my husband. According to him, the second time it happened I had called him to come home (he was out at the time) saying that the children had informed me that it (another seizure) had happened again.

The third time it happened (on the same day) my husband called my sisters to come over to help watch the kids and take me to the hospital. I was able to tell my sisters what to pack etc but I don't recall any of it. I don't recall calling my husband, I don't recall speaking to my sisters. I only recall getting into the car to go to hospital and the events following. I remember they gave me an oxygen mask to help me breathe and asking me a lot of questions which I could answer. My memory is gone for events that took place for half a day ie from the afternoon when I wanted to take a bath and only returned at night from the hospital onwards. It feels so strange and scary not to remember.

I had bitten both sides of my tongues to shreds. It was so painful I could hardly eat and talk over the next few days. I was coughing repeatedly as I had caught an infection from swallowing fluids during the seizure and my whole body ached liked I had ran a marathon!

Oh. I had started this post intending to write about my dream/nightmare upon coming home from the hospital but this post has taken a whole different form. I guess its good to write and get this out of the chest. I'll write about my dream/nightmare in another post then.

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  1. Oh my my..dear MG, I'm so sorry to hear what you've gone thru. How I wish I could be there to help you and your family. Please take good care of yourself. Like what your husband said before, take care of yourself first.

  2. Oh, dear. I am sorry to hear that. I wish i know what to say to comfort you but i dont know much about seizures. But i do know how you feel, the fear of not being able to be there for your kids.

    Take care

  3. Take good care of yourself and don't worry too much. God is there to protect you and your family always.

  4. vien,
    Its just so geli to me to know that my brains can merajuk and shut down suddenly! But I'm feeling better now, thanks.

    allthingspurple, sabrina,
    Thanks for your encouraging words.


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